#111 LONELINESS, AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT

A friend told me recently, "I visited a lonely old lady just the other day, as she was in a rest home the victim of a stroke.  For her life had become bitter and frustrated.  She complained because she felt her friends and family had almost deserted her.  Nothing that was done for her was quite right, she felt all alone.' Now this picture is not uncommon in these times.  Even in vast population areas there arc many people who arc lonely.  Perhaps at times it's almost a certainty that you and I will experience this feeling of helplessness that we call loneliness.  Many years ago in the period of the divided kingdom of Israel, during the rein of King Ahab and his Queen Jezebel, there lived a godly man by the name of Elijah.  Yet when Elijah fought against the evils of his day, in particular his contest on Mt.  Carmel with the four hundred fifty false prophets of Baal, he felt that he must be all alone and he wanted to run away.  He did so and then he sat down in a cave and cried out 'And 1, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away."(I Kings 19:10) Now God's question to Elijah has meaning for us today, 'What doest thou here Elijah?" (I Kings 19:9) Of all people in the world what are you doing here?  The courageous prophet sulks alone in a cave, feeling sorry for himself and longing to die.  His mood has changed from triumph to despair.  Since loneliness is a part of each person’s experience, what arc the cures for it?  May I make these suggestions:

  1. Realize that such times of loneliness are common to all people, but they should be temporary.  The psalmist asked himself, "Why art thou cast down on my soul, and why art thou disquieted me.' And then immediately he comes back with the answer, "Hope thou in God, for I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance." (Psalms 42:5)

  2. Remember that God is always available to help you overcome loneliness.  One of the verses that has helped me puts it this way, "But I trusted in thee O Lord: I said, thou art my God.  My times are in thy hand."(Psalms 31:14-15) If God is directing your life you'll not have any real cause to worry or be alarmed.  "In nothing be anxious," wrote the apostle Paul, "but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.  And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall guard your hearts and thoughts in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:6-7)

  3. Decide to get busy helping others.  If Elijah had answered the question, "What doest thou here?” he would have had to say nothing, absolutely nothing.  Now that was why he had time to feel sorry for himself and to be lonely.  God involves us in good works to our great advantage.  Help those who are sick or shut in.  Call a person on the phone to cheer him up.  Mail a card of sunshine to a friend.  You and I are in the world to serve, to live, to help and when we're doing this we just don't have time to feel sorry.  That's the way God answers our problem of loneliness.  Once, Sir Winfred Grinfall, a famous surgeon of England, was asked what was his most thrilling experience.  He related an experience involving the invitation he received to deliver the graduating speech to four hundred nurses of the Massachusetts General Hospital.  Just prior to the time of his graduation message, he learned that eight nurses were desperately needed in Labrador to work in his hospital.  He decided to make a plea.  'Yet all I have to offer," he told the graduates, "is clothes and room and board and work.  You'll be giving one year of your lives for God." When Dr. Grinfall asked for volunteers there was a murmur that went up over the whole crowd.  And then he raised his hand for silence and asked, "Are there eight of you who will give one year of your life to my master?' A moment later about three-fourths of that class of nurses stood up.  Jesus said, "Inasmuch as you did it unto one of these my brethren even these least you did it unto me." These suggestions will help overcome loneliness.